Thursday, January 04, 2007

~wah...wat's with me for this yr man?~

wahz...2dae is really not a very good day for me...in the morning especially...sigh...yup...i know my boss is back...means will kena alot...and true enough...i really kena-ed ALOT from him...sigh...in the morning...before i can start doing my work (which is alot as it's the beginning of the month...), my boss summoned me into his cubicle...sigh...and there he goes...Yak n Yak n Yak!...i think it's really God that helped me to control my temper...last time, i'm someone who used to talk back and shout back at my boss...but now...i juz kept quiet...juz let him finish scolding...then i go back and do my work...anyway for today...i really juz kept quiet...controlling my temper...plus it's also that i really totally have no idea how to do the changes to the numbers...and totally do not know which are the most updated numbers! all along my supervisor had been doing the necessary changes and we (or i) are really not informed of which should be the correct figures. those are budget 2007 numbers and they are always changing it...how would i noe which is the correct? and my supervisor is not around...therefore i really do not noe anything about the numbers...and there i am...tried my best in finding the most updated and 'correct' numbers i could ever find in the shared driver...and did out a template for him...never did i know he had a hard copy of some presentation on duno when and the numbers do not tie! i really duno how to explain what happened at that time...but i know i was scolded from head to toe...(really innocently scolded! i mean i totally do not know what's going on and i'm taking all the shitty blame!)...i was totally lost at that time...totally kept myself quiet...den he kept on bombarding me 'So How? the numbers dun tie! i'm going to submit the numbers in and you r going to be responsible for it! it's 1mil difference you noe?!'...i really have nothing to say lor...really...juz kept quiet n continue to let him scold...thereafter he said 'Aiyah, i duno you all lah! Tomorrow all just resign lah!'...i was totally shocked by wat he said lor...really...the word 'resign' really just hit me hard! i juz left the cubicle...and tears just start rolling down my eyes...again...and this is only the 4th day of 2007...been crying for these few days...realy dun understand wat's wrong with me...y have i become someone who cried alot? where's my strong front? sigh...when i went back to my seat..i really juz stared blankly at my screen...and keep thinking about resigning...i really duno what to do...sigh...guess u all juz wun understand how i feel...sigh...(why are so many shitty things happening in this yr? it's only afew days and i've faced so much shit!)...anyway...awhile later my boss came back to nag again...but i think he saw me crying (my tears lah)...thereafter, for the morning, i wasn't really nagged at...but still, i have to produce the template and figures for him...but i did other work first...sigh...but it's still not the reports i'm supposed to be doing...have to clear some request by other people...didnt even have time to go have lunch...actually really no appetite to eat...(but was being nagged at to eat)...so i asked my colleague to da bao a fillet burger for me...ate it and continue w my work...after done with the requests by other ppl, i'm back to doing out the new template for my boss...den my whole afternoon was juz doing that...being called in and out...together with Florence...glad that at least she helped me abit...den about the evening, i've finally cleared my boss...as in the work...but...the numbers still do not tie...means i really gotta be responsible for the numbers...cos it's a huge cut...sigh...if this yr the cashplus team not enough money den i'm responsible lor...sian rite?i'm not in cashplus team...but i'm doing and facing so much shit for them...sigh...
after all has been cleared, i finally got time to do my own reports liao...but...i'm long long overdue in submitting the report...so now i'm really rushing it out!heez...now still in office lor...11pm liao...really tired...wana go home asap!hmmm...
hopefully tmr no need to OT...cos got dinner w family n relatives...yay...heez...
k gotta stop...continue w work liao...byeee...
take care n God Bless~

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