Friday, January 26, 2007

~frustrated!~

sigh...feeling down...really down...sad...sad till now i'm drowning myself with work...though i getting to hate it more and more...i really duno wat to do...asked God for answers...but i can't hear...guess i din try hard enough...
when i heard the news...i juz kept quiet...while in my mind, many things are bombarding wat i'm thinking...thinking abt wat's the point of staying when there are so much changes in the structure of work...thinking y i'm always being pushed here n there at work(meaning i keep changing team n changing supervisors but job scope somehow the same)...i'm...i'm juz sick of it...ARGHHHHH!!!...i'm sooo angry...but wat can i do?i can't say anything...dun have any say though...the best i can do is just quit...but...wat about my (maybe) promotion? wat abt my variable bonus? should i wait? or should i juz go? i do not have my degree yet...how to get a better job? it's difficult...really...but...i really duno wat to do...i broke down...literally broke down in the toilet...and keep asking God WHY...didnt get an answer...i'm tired...really tired...i love my job...but...i'm tired...i really duno wat to do...all i can do now is wait for God's direction...but i'm afraid...afraid i canot take it anymore...but...i should really put my faith in Him...i shouldnt have doubts...sigh...guess it's so...but juz sad...every now and then. when i think abt this thing...i really juz wana break down n cry again...sigh...
*Lord, i Need you*

*felt bad not attending the wake today (also for net too there)...but i dowan my bad mood to affect the rest...*

take care n God Bless~

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